Writing it makes it more real...

On Friday, we received the news we had been waiting for. Was Sweet T available for us to adopt? Our agency was committed to finding out what happened. Our caseworker had been praying along with us that we have a definite no or a definite yes. On Friday afternoon we found out that it was a definite no. She had been matched with another family.

Our hearts our sad. We can hardly talk about it. Scratch that, we can't talk about it. If you saw us, you wouldn't know that we had received hard news. But it's hard. Very hard. For 9 months, we have prayed for Tinsley, looked at the same pictures, and watched her sweet videos. We planned her side of the room with her excited older sister and picked out clothes for her. We dreamed about our future with her. For those who have had a baby, we were on that pregnancy journey. And now we do not have anything to show for it.

We've done this before. We know the feelings and grief that come with it. We also know that God has a plan. We would appreciate your prayers but unless you have experienced this, please refrain from giving us advice. A hug is sufficient. If you believe we are crazy to grieve a child we have never met, please keep that to yourself. We do not care to hear it. I tell you this because I wish I would have had the courage to say it with Hannah.

Prayers are appreciated as we grieve and make decisions. An adoption will happen. God has made that clear. But we must grieve Tinsley properly. Please do not ask us what our plans are. We will share those as God reveals them. The journey has not ended but a part has been closed. And sometimes a closed doors brings tears. Thank you for your understanding.


"The Lord gave and The Lord has taken away; 
may the name of The Lord be praised. "

So..How's Your Adoption Going?

This is a question that is asked at least 5-6 times a week. We love to see that people care so much about our future child! But lately, that question has created a bit of a heartache. So, what is going on? Let's catch up...

When we found Sweet T, our agency had her file. This was great! But then C*hina did some switcharoo's and Sweet T was 'lost' in the system. Our agency has fought from the beginning to get her file and has not had success. Yet. We are still clinging to that yet. We officially became LID today which means our paperwork was logged in with C*hina! Yay! That also means that the C*hina side of our agency team will look harder for Sweet T's file. We are hoping to know within 2 weeks if she is available or will become available. We waited 5 months for Peter's file to become available. Our sweet caseworker shared with me today that she, too, hears God saying, "Wait" not "Stop." She has continued to fight for us in every way that she can. She told me that she cannot wait to call us and tell us that God said "Yes!" We are all praying that it's Little Miss Sweet T.  After hearing some hard news a couple of weeks ago, today was encouraging. But the two weeks also gave us time to remember that His ways are the best ways and He has this all planned out.

Some other news that was hard to take is that we do not qualify for the adoption tax credit. Something to do with tax liability and being self employed. This was a bit of a blow because that's how we were going to pay for the remainder of our adoption. I guess we should be depending on God, not the government, for our adoption funds. We did a lot of fundraising with Peter and had hoped to avoid that this time. So unless someone plans on writing us a huge check or a lot of someone's write us small checks, we will be hitting the fundraising again. We want to do this in the best way and without being annoying. :-) We also want a picture to share so you know who you are raising funds for!

Peter news...Peter recovered extremely well and extremely fast from his surgery. One week after we were home, he 'knocked' a bit to hard on a window and his fist went through. Off to the ER for stitches. Then last Saturday, he had a horrible fall. Absolutely horrible. We are praising our God that he survived. His face was not pretty afterwards but he is alive! His next surgery is scheduled for July 1st. He will be having his nose and lips corrected.Here are a few pictures. I have been horrible about taking pictures lately. I have a few on my phone that I need to get off also.

 Eating Chicken Feet

 Peter and his buddy Jamison

 Friends at his birthday party

 First birthday party! He is so cute!!!!

 Dinner with Grace and Mr. Matt

Working on something, as usual. He has made a table, stool, shield, and another project.